Friend Science

Friend Science: Power With vs. Power Over

August 24, 2021


More Friend Science


Kyle Condra on October 12, 2021 at 10:57 am

Absolutely loved this!

Nikki Smith on September 7, 2021 at 8:12 pm

This series was amazing and it is absolutely the kind of content that I'd pay to continue to see. Please bring back Science Mike for more insightful videos inspired by Mythical content!

Micheal DeHart II on September 2, 2021 at 8:13 pm

I've put off watching the friend science videos because I just didn't feel like it was the kind of thing I was going to be into on the app. Now I have no idea why I didn't watch before now. Man. Mike honestly made me tear up a bit. So heartfelt and honestly calming the way he exclaims things. Thank you Mike and Mythical for this. I didn't really know I needed this but wow I really did.

K Solo on August 31, 2021 at 1:48 pm

Thank you for introducing me to Ted Lasso. Warched the entire first season thinking about everything Mike talked about in this episode. So many laughs and so many tears.

Nathan Moore on August 31, 2021 at 1:29 am

This is officially my favorite show of on the Society. We could all do with more Science Mike.

Carrie Pettitt on August 30, 2021 at 10:00 pm

Ugh, I just love Mike! He speaks to my soul! I'm so sad friend Science is finished, I hope there's something more on the horizon!

Liz Glass on August 29, 2021 at 5:56 pm

Dang Mike, I didn't expect to cry. This one hit home on many levels. I will miss this series. Hope you, Rhett and Link consider another series like this topic. Thank you!

K Solo on August 30, 2021 at 12:33 am

Thank you so much for this series. What an amazing way to share your growth and encourage Mythical Beasts to look at themselves and possibly grow as well. I am two years older than Rhett & Link and being listening to and watching their journeys has given me hope and courage to keep pushing forward many a time.

Thank you again for this amazing series and to Mike. 💜🧚🏻

Audrina on August 29, 2021 at 2:08 am

I have enjoyed this series so much! Thank you, Mike, for sharing your wonderful insights with us! And thanks to Rhett and Link for making another meaningful show for us to enjoy and learn from! The world needs more Mythical Beasts! xo

Michelle Griffin on August 27, 2021 at 10:44 pm

Hello. I have learned so much with this series. I want it to continue. Now I’m going to watch Ted Lasso.

Anna Baldwin on August 27, 2021 at 4:58 pm

I have loved this series so much, thank you Mike. I'm so happy to have found you through Rhett and Link and I can't wait to see what's in the future if you do more series for the society! <3

Lindsay Johnson on August 26, 2021 at 4:34 pm

This was a great episode. Thanks Mike!

Elmie K-E on August 25, 2021 at 7:46 am

Dear Mike,
I didn't comment on the previous episode, and I'm here late, because between the last episode and this one I lost a friendship. I knew the relationship between this friend and my other friends had become toxic over the months, but the Friend Science series helped me become more sure my instinct about that was right. This friend's boundaries were inconsistent - infuriatingly so - and the last episode helped me realise that this friend was trying to establish other people's boundaries for them in order to get the upper hand, and prevent open communication between the group. From the start there'd been a power imbalance tipped in this friend's direction, but I'd always assumed I just had to ignore it in order to let the relationship work. This week I figured out how that power dynamic was just another factor in the relationship's toxicity.
It's been a messy week, but ultimately only good things came of the processing I had to do in this time. My friendships with the rest of the group are stronger now, as we've had to unite to recognise that we were never alone in our discomfort. And now we've expressed outright that we trust one another, in response to the doubt that this other friend caused.
In all my life, if I've ever lost friendships it's because they faded due to lack of attention, but this one had to be shut down, and the person shut out because they're not willing to change their behaviour despite knowing it's hurting people. It's almost uncanny how this series coincided topically with what I've been experiencing: at first establishing what I already knew about healthy relationships, then moving into what can happen in unhealthy ones, and showing the comparison. What Rhett said last episode about trauma bonding, and a relationship moving too fast when there's something difficult in common, made me realise that had happened with this friend and our group. We'd connected during the quarantine, overshared our lives, and had become enmeshed. And due to the power dynamic, the ball was always in that friend's court, so the only way for us to escape that was to step away entirely.
Thank you, Mike, for making it so much easier to process and move through this. I've been telling my (non-Society) friends about this series as it went along. It's been an amazing resource and I desperately hope there's more someday soon. Friend Science is also the reason I started commenting on this site, which gave me the confidence to comment in the Society Discord, and now I've made a handful of friends there in just a few days. I genuinely don't think I would've felt compelled to engage the way I wanted to without this series, because I think I had some fear that making new friends would mean I'd struggle to maintain friendships with current friends. But here I am, doing it anyway. I think it'll work out just fine :D
Also... I've had many a panic attack in my life, and I teared up at the clip where Rebecca stays calm and smiles through Ted's panic attack. That kind of energy in those moments is incredibly powerful, so I'm not surprised it only took Ted seconds to settle. I like to think that's the difference between compassion and empathy - understanding the feeling and knowing how to help, as opposed to feeling it along with someone.
And that Couples Products Test is one of my all-time favourite GMM episodes, for the exact reasons you pointed out. Sometimes I just rewatch the part with the glasses because that playful, intimate trust between Rhett and Link warms my heart to the core, and never fails to make me smile.
Thank you again, Mike. You're awesome. And so is everyone who helped make this show exist in the form that it does.
Elmie x

Mike McHargue on August 26, 2021 at 10:28 am

Thank you for sharing your experience, Elmie. I am so glad the series helped you navigate such a challenging situation.

May you find healing, and an abundance of supportive friendships.


Randi Dossey on August 25, 2021 at 4:25 am

This is some of the most insightful and beautiful content I’ve ever seen created for the internet. It should be required learning. For everyone. Thank you so much.

Linda Kinney on August 25, 2021 at 6:11 am

Thank you, Mark. The link worked

Linda Kinney on August 25, 2021 at 5:12 am

where can I find episode 3??? I'm a 3rd degree, but haven't found it

Mythical Society on August 25, 2021 at 9:28 am

Hi Linda, you can find the third episode here :)

Linda Kinney on August 25, 2021 at 5:43 pm

Thanks,Mythical Beast Mark helped me. I got to watch it this morning

Mark Stanley on August 24, 2021 at 10:47 pm

Hi Linda, I've fetched the link for you -- I'm not sure I can post links, though since I'm just a random beast. :)

Madison Christian on August 24, 2021 at 5:25 pm

thank you mike, i'm gonna miss these!

Jade Avery (they/them) on August 24, 2021 at 12:55 pm

So incredibly well defined and explained! The best one yet!

Ashley Heidelberg on August 24, 2021 at 7:39 pm

This is my favorite episode so far! I super appreciate the thoughtfulness of this series.

Emilia Palo on August 24, 2021 at 11:23 am

This is one of the best things ever to come out of this society. Mike gives so much insight on friendship and different things affecting it.

MushyPeas on August 24, 2021 at 11:03 am

I can’t believe this is the last episode of Friend Science with Mike 🥺 I wasn’t ready 😢💜

Heather Pellegrini on August 24, 2021 at 9:34 pm

I kno! 😕 that’s what I thought! I was really enjoying this to! I’m surprised this is the last one, I mean it didn’t go for very long either but on a positive note, they were really good! 👍🏻

Marie Apodaca on August 24, 2021 at 9:20 am

I love Friend Science. one of the MOST valuable series on the society

Brittany C. on August 24, 2021 at 7:33 am

As a Mythical Beast, the content MS offers is always worth it. As a therapist, this series in particular has been one of my favorites because of the thoughtful way Mike handles discussions of power dynamics, connection, and healthy friendships.

Caroline Harris on August 24, 2021 at 11:49 am

I love this; such a great message about not being too dominant. I also enjoy the panic attack scene, as a divorced person who has had panic attacks I feel they depict it perfectly. if only we all had friends who could be that calm and stable for us when we need it. I hope to be that support person for anyone I come across who needs me in future.

Adam Temple on August 24, 2021 at 4:31 am

best episode of Friend Science yet!

CeCe Cherry on August 24, 2021 at 4:29 am

I love Friend Science! One of the best reasons to be in the Society besides all the other things.